Good morning! I’m feeling fresh and ready
to go after a gargantuan 14-hour sleep. Heaven. Ivana arrived at 8pm and, after
a quick catch-up and me playing Mum (I think the combination of
sleep-deprivation and missing her family got to her a bit), it was finally time
for some well-earned sleep. Australia is actually very similar to England, but I have noticed a few little amusing things
that are very different from the way of life in the UK.
Number one: I’m aware that I could have
happily slept in a bath tub last night, so it didn’t make too much difference,
but the bed is so short that I had to lie diagonally across the double for all
of me to fit. Australians: Are you all really short, or have I just been given
a midget’s bed?!
Number two: There isn’t the same worrying
about political correctness here, which I love. Lindy was telling me that the
elections are next week and, from what I’ve seen of the TV campaigns, they
pretty much use any little bit of dirt they can find to comprimise the
competition. One advert I saw consisted of photoshopping an eyepatch, black
tooth and parrot onto a picture of the labor leader and detailing how it’s
pretty much the fault of this “pirate lord” that loads of immigrants have made
it into Australia. Brilliant. In fact, most Australian TV is just the more
offensive brother of British TV. They love all of Attenborough’s documentaries,
which I fully understand, and have their own versions of Total Wipeout and
Britain’s Got Talent, where the judges seem a bit drunk and hurl abuse at bad
acts.
Number three: I’ve watched half an hour of
Aussie Rules Football and I love it. It’s like football, but you’re allowed to
kick each other a bit and there’s a little rugby thrown in. In fact I’d love to
see some of the premiership footballers give it a go, mostly because of the
violence that would be inflicted upon them. Fremantle, one of the two local teams, has a shot at being in
the final for the first time ever, so I’ve been told to expect football fever in the lab.
Number four: After checking with Ivana that
I wasn’t hearing things during the night, we have found the source of a very
strange noise this morning while walking. There is a weird, massive crow whose
call sounds like what I can only describe as a cat being sick. For anyone who
hasn’t heard this noise, other comparisons we came up with include a kind of
warbly sheep’s bleat and Cartman from South Park’s “dying giraffe” impression.
Look it up, it’s hilarious.
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